God’s Livejournal
Back in December, God threatened to resign, as per His Livejournal. I stopped visiting said Livejournal for that reason. Today, out of a sense of nostalgia about the state of the world, I became sentimental and I missed God, so I re-visited His Livejournal and Behold! He was still there. I am sure there is a profound lesson here.
Unbeknownst to me, God’s Saints also have a Livejournal. Though God’s threatened departure has been erased from His Livejournal (how very Him-like to change his mind and then erase the change from History. I think he did that with Lilith, once), the Saints Livejournal has the traces (we fallible humans are always the traces of His imperfection). Some of His Saints are very good at interpreting his absence. Others, predictably, are just bad typists. See the 11/07/02 entry:
There they found the Pope pointing to a single word on a parchment, repeating over and over, “There’s an ‘R’, there’s an ‘R’! It’s ‘celebrate’, not ‘celibate!’”
Which makes me wonder a lot about the Bible.
So I sent him an email:
Dear God:
I stopped surfing your livejournal because I thought you left. But I missed you, so I went to visit for old times’ sake, and, behold, you were still there. Yay. I would have posted but I am not a member of your elite, so I just thought I would tell you in a private communication. Now that you’re back, though, I do have a question. What exactly -is- the connection between George W. Bush and your rival, Satan. Is there any truth to this website? George W. Bush is the Anti-Christ (note: This link was sent to me by the inimitable Shaun Treat).
Please let me know soon because I’m worried.
In other news, my blog is long and probably needs to be archived soon.
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